Monday, February 21, 2005

The Comely Commode

With recent bathroom-related posts by fellow bloggers Gary and Heather, I was inspired to throw in my own two cents. I read this in Friday's USA Today and knew sitting on the can would never be the same again. All the cool, chic people will soon be doing their business in style with this $3,000 hatbox toilet from Kohler.

Just in case you have to go while wearing pumps and a dress

"There's no reason why a toilet can't evolve beyond what it's looked like for the last 100 years," said Mike Chandler, vice president of marketing for Kohler.

Exactly, Mike. And thanks to you and your company for looking at the same ol' toilet we've all been using for decades and thinking, "Hey, we can do better." Just look at how stylish that thing is, with no tank. (Where the hell will we now put our magazines or boxes of tissue?)

Even better, the seat is ergonomically designed with "pressure mapping" that conforms to the bottom and back of the legs. No more uncomfortable seats for us, people. Now, it'll form around your butt just like your favorite armchair. (Wouldn't that make you less likely to offer your toilet to someone else? "Hey man, don't ruin my butt mold - I finally got that thing just right!")

New Yorkers will get all the fun first. So if they like it, I guess the rest of us will get to join in too. Maybe Gary or Mis Hooz will shell out for the new can and let us know how it works. You thought the line to the bathroom was long at parties before - wait'll you get one of these.