Monday, March 26, 2007

The Spring Gleaming

Temperatures are expected to reach 75 degrees in the southeastern Michigan area today, which means I have something of a tough decision to make. I'm not quite ready to break out the shorts, but the thermostat's not really giving me a choice. 70 degrees is kind of my personal tipping point for exposing my legs to the people, so if we're going five degrees past that, my decision has really already been made. Besides, my boys need some color.

However, bringing out the legs from a winter of shelter holds inherent risks for virtually anyone I might encounter outside of my car today. If you've been sticking with FRT for a while, you might remember me writing about this last year (albeit a month later on the calendar - there's a Mr. Al Gore on line 2), and if so, I apologize for making you relive the horror. But we live in a largely visual world these days, so pictures are necessary to drive home my point. Thus, I'm posting the same image of my legs, pre-spring and summer, as I did last year. There's really no need to take an updated photo, as the situation is much the same in 2007 as it was in 2006.

For those newly aboard the FRT train over the past year, I should warn you now. Put on sunglasses. Or don't look directly at your screen once you scroll past this paragraph. Okay, are you ready? Are you sure? Here we go...

A natural question, of course, would be whether or not I doctored this photo to accentuate the paleness of my boys. An understandable follow-up might ask whether or not those are really my legs. Both excellent questions. A possible third question could inquire as to whether or not I'd wear those shoes. Unfortunately, there are no concrete answers I can give you. Because it doesn't matter. Even if dramatic liberties have been taken - and I am not admitting any such thing - they still point to an essential truth. My legs are white. Very white. And they need some sun. Be afraid. Be very afraid.