How is Tracy Morgan Not on Animal Planet?

When I saw that Tracy Morgan was returning to Saturday Night Live to host, I had only one wish for the episode: A "Brian Fellow's Safari Planet" skit. Thank you, SNL.



Why I think this character is so funny, I don't know. When I've tried to explain Brian Fellow to someone who hasn't seen it, I get blank stares in return. But somehow, Tracy yelling "I'm Brian Fellows!" to the camera just hits that funny bone. That's crazy!

Today's Photo - 03/15/09

Winter is definitely over when the Dairy Queen on Packard opens for the spring.


Actually, I think it opened on March 2, when it was cold as hell outside. Not much of a line then. You can't see it in the photo, but there was quite a line at around 4:30 p.m. today. And everyone was in a good mood.

(Oh, and I'm sure you wanted to know: I got a small Heath Blizzard.)

Even Lex Luthor Needs a Bailout

When the greatest criminal mind of our time (well, at least in 1978) can't even afford to bankroll another fiendish scheme to destroy Superman, you know our economy is really struggling.

"Lex Luthor Bailout" with Jon Hamm - watch more funny videos

Maybe you need one of those Congressional hearings, Lex.

And a nice bald wig on Jon Hamm there, eh?

Perhaps this was also a tip of the cap to those in the geeksosphere who think he'd make a fine Superman whenever another one of those movies gets made. (I think I'd count myself among that group, though he might be a big too old for the role now. Seems crazy to say when Hamm's career is just catching fire, though.)

(via Geek Tyrant)

No Podcast Tonight

UPDATE (9:30 p.m.): I've been out all day, and unfortunately, didn't get a chance to check my e-mail until just now. The podcast has been postponed for tonight. We'll probably do an AL Central roundtable of some sort next week. Apologies for the mix-up, and if you were planning to listen tonight, thank you.

# # #
Apparently, I just can't get enough of talking to people about the Detroit Tigers. (Or I just love hearing myself talk.) Seth Stohs of SethSpeaks.net invited me to appear on his Minnesota Twins Weekly Podcast tonight on BlogTalkRadio. The broadcast will begin at 10 p.m. EST.

I'm not sure who else is scheduled to appear, but I believe Seth will be talking to bloggers who cover Minnesota's rivals in the AL Central division. (I should probably bring up how many readers at Bless You Boys hold serious grudges toward the Twins, right? That could make things interesting.)

You can listen to the show at BlogTalkRadio.com, but if you miss it, a download of the show will be available later on for you to peruse at your discretion.

Once again, the show begins at 10 p.m. EST. I'm not yet sure when I'll be on, but I was told to call in by then, so maybe we'll start talking about the AL Central right away. Thanks to Seth for inviting me.

The Most Famous Jay Buhner and Ken Phelps Have Ever Been

In a post I'm writing for tomorrow at Bless You Boys, I made a reference to Frank Costanza's infamous question to George Steinbrenner while the New York Yankees owner was presumably giving him bad news about his son. This is one of my favorite Seinfeld moments.

Just in case you were wondering why I'd post this video.



After seeing that, I sometimes used to fantasize about Tom Monaghan coming to my house and my father asking him how he could trade John Smoltz to the Braves for Doyle Alexander Of course, I also would be dead (or believed dead) in this scenario, so it didn't hold a lot of appeal to me.

If You Ever Need to Ditch 3 1/2 Pounds of Carrots...

Is this video demonstrating the power of new toilet flushing technology fascinating or a little bit disturbing? I mean, really - how often is some of this stuff used to demonstrate flushing capacity going to find its way into your toilet?


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After watching that, I'm reminded of shopping for new toilets last year as we suddenly had to remodel both of our bathrooms. The salesperson at Lowe's was raving about a toilet that could flush 10-15 golf balls. ("It does! I've tried it!")

While I appreciated that capability, I also wondered what I could possibly produce in the bathroom that would be the equivalent of a bucket of golf balls. Instead, maybe I should be thinking of incriminating evidence that I may need to dispose of someday. Maybe the next demonstration of toilet technology will have a foot sticking out of the bowl as someone tries to push it in, like with the woodchipper in Fargo.

(via Thompson on Hollywood)

Talkin' Tigers on the Radio: Spring Training Spectacular

I was invited onto "The Benchwarmers" last night to talk Detroit Tigers and Spring Training on Toledo's WSPD (1370-AM). They gave me the thumbs-up to post some audio from last night's show, so here's a clip of my appearance. (I'm glad I got a chance to use that recording software again.)

The second hour of the show was their "Spring Training Spectacular," and we discussed how the team is looking so far, what important competitions remain (especially among the pitching staff), and whether or not some players can rebound this season.  (Adam Van Arsdale from SB Nation's Cleveland Indians blog, Let's Go Tribe, was on later to discuss the his team's chances in 2009.)

Thanks to Jim Kushlan for inviting me onto the show, especially while the Toledo area was under a tornado warning.  Somehow, the idea of people listening to some baseball talk while seeking shelter in their basement isn't entirely comforting.

You can listen to an embedded audio clip below or download the file from the accompanying link.



WSPD_030809

If Barack Obama Got Angry

If you didn't catch Saturday Night Live last night, you missed Rahm Emanuel's fantasy about Barack Obama. (Actually, I think this is a fantasy many people share. And I'm not just saying that because my borderline man-crush*, The Rock -who got himself a feature in the Sunday New York Times - is involved.)



Gee, I think I'd like the president when he's angry.

I was going to call that Rahm Emanuel's wet dream, but I'm betting that'd involve him doing the smashing and throwing himself. And Andy Samberg's Emanuel continues to be hilarious.

* Why "borderline"? Because I wouldn't go to a movie just because The Rock is in it.

The Rorschach Test

Tomorrow is the big day. Watchmen hits theaters, and I'll probably be catching a matinee. (I don't think I can do the midnight showing tonight for a near-three hour flick.) I'm at that point I often get to with movies like this, where I can't take any more hype.

I can't watch any more trailers online, I can't watch any more "sneak peeks" on TV, and I can't read any more reviews. (Though I've really enjoyed CHUD.com's video interviews with cast and crew.) And though Alan Moore's writing has brought great joy to my life over the years, I really don't give a shit what he thinks about his work being adapted because he's just trying to piss on everyone's parade.

I just want to see the damn thing.

At some point, probably when I'm sitting in my seat before the previews begin, I'll wonder if I've set myself up to be disappointed by getting so excited. (I read through the book one more time this week, which was probably a bad idea.) But really, Iron Man and The Dark Knight cooked a lot of that angst out of me. And I know by the time that WB logo hits the screen, I won't even care about that stuff because I'll still be in disbelief that a Watchmen movie has really been made.

In the meantime, however, I'll occupy myself with more promotional material, such as this video of the special effects used to create Rorschach's mask. So cool!



I can only hope we'll get a similar video detailing the work that went into creating Dr. Manhattan's big blue schlong, my favorite description of which is Cinematical's "dangling like a participle with no tomorrow."

♦ I can't post that Rorschach "Obamicon" image, without giving proper credit to the artist, Warren Hart. You can buy t-shirts with the graphic here.

♦ All the Watchmen footage released online, edited into one clip? Here you are.

♦ Salon.com has a new interview with Alan Moore.

♦ What would a Watchmen Saturday morning cartoon have looked like?

Cross The Daily Show at Your Peril, CNBC

I thought David Letterman was glorious when he was cranky. Do not get on Jon Stewart's bad side, ladies and gentlemen. (Though I suspect he and his staff have had a rant against CNBC brewing for quite some time. Nine minutes of material?)

The Daily Show With Jon StewartM - Th 11p / 10c

CNBC Gives Financial Advice

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No one likes to have their plans canceled. Doing it to someone with the bully pulpit of a TV show, however, is probably a really bad idea.

So how soon before CNBC tries to send Erin Burnett or Maria Bartiromo over as an olive branch?

(Meanwhile, the stock market continues its plunge toward Shitsville as I write this.)

Bitten by Bittman

I've spent a lot of time reading Mark Bittman's blog and columns, viewing his video podcasts, trying out his "Minimalist" recipes in my kitchen (all available at NYTimes.com), and watching him traipse around Spain with Mario Batali and Gwyneth Paltrow. He's also influenced my eating, cooking, and shopping habits quite a bit in recent months. (As has, of course, our dear vegetarian friend Mis Hooz, over the years.)

So I was pretty geeked to see him on The Colbert Report Tuesday night to promote his new book, Food Matters.

Enthusiasm is a dish best shared, don't you think?

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Mark Bittman

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And now, Bittman's on Twitter, too. Maybe I can get some ideas for dinner tonight from that.

Team Venezuela = Average Joe's?

We try not to double-dip between blogs too much, but I thought this post from Bless You Boys might play well here, too.

For those non-baseball fans in the crowd, countries from around the world are taking part in an international tournament called the World Baseball Classic. And many major league players have just left their teams to participate. There's a distinct Detroit Tigers flavor to the Venezuela squad, with four of them playing for national pride. Yesterday, with the team taking the field for the first time, photos were released of their uniforms.

Here's a picture of Miguel Cabrera and Magglio Ordonez sporting the national togs:

As soon as I saw the uniforms, I started to get an itch in my brain. They looked so familiar to me, yet I couldn't quite place them. Then sometime after dinner, it hit me: They're the same outfits that Average Joe's wore in Dodgeball. Take a look for yourself. Now batting, Peter LaFleur:


As Pepper Brooks might say, "It's a bold strategy, Cotton. Let's see if it pays off for 'em."

(Either that, or he'd say, "Effin' A, Cotton, Effin' A!")

Today's Photo - 03/03/09

I was going to snap a photo of the pothole problem on my street, which offically grew out of control this week, with at least eight problematic, rim-bending crevasses.


Fortunately, it appears that someone either contacted the city of Ann Arbor about the problem or perhaps waste removal crews complained that one of their trucks was almost damaged by these things. As of this morning, the holes were patched up.

So I didn't get the picture of a deep, tire-swallowing pothole that I wanted. Snooze, and you lose. I guess a smoother, less obstacle course-like drive will have to be a consolation.

Shaking a Fist at Twitter?

I've had a few conversations with friends and colleagues about Twitter lately, some of whom feel "it's stupid" or they don't really get it. My response is that the mistake is to think that Twitter is just for one thing. It's what you make of it: A microblog, a RSS feed for your blog, a news feed for you, a social outlet to share experiences (like the inauguration or Oscars), a communication tool with other bloggers, networking with people in your field, etc.

However, I'm not sure that answer would do much for Jon Stewart.

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Twitter Frenzy

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Of course, Twitter has that sort of "trendy" vibe, and I think that's what puts some people off of it. And when politicians, journalists, and broadcasters adopt it to look cool, doesn't that make it the opposite of cool? (I do believe, however, that some of those people are sincere about using as a communication tool.) But maybe I'm the wrong guy to talk to about this, because I love Twitter.

By the way, if you really are curious about Twitter and looking for a good explanation, I recommend two videos that Steve Isaacs posted as sort of a primer. (His vlog is worth a regular stop, anyway. Unlike, say, Samantha Bee's pretend one.)