But I really wanted fries with that

This is the Virgin Mary? Really? In a @#$%-ING GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICH??


But hey, the lady holding onto this sandwich for 10 years got $28,000 for it on eBay, so who's the sucker?

That looks more like Marlene Dietrich to me. It's a good thing I wasn't with Diana Duyser when she ordered that sandwich. Not too many unfinished sandwiches sit around when I'm at the table.

How did the thing never get moldy? Brendan I. Koerner, who's scratched so many of my intellectual itches, explains all in his outstanding Explainer column for Slate.

You know, I've always thought my aunt's stuffing was heavenly. I'll be looking for Moses in every spoonful tomorrow.