Monday, July 14, 2008

It's Not Called the Stanley Bidet

The Stanley Cup is the greatest trophy in sports. Even my father, who wasn't a hockey fan, was awed by this glorious chalice when he glimpsed it with his own eyes at the Hockey Hall of Fame in Toronto. So it's not really something you let your kid take a $#!+ in, Kris Draper. Yet that's exactly what happened last month while the Cup was in his possession.

Red Wings forward Kris Draper revealed during the weekend that his diaperless baby, Kamryn, did a number on the Cup last month. A number two, to be exact.

"A week after we won it, I had my newborn daughter in there, and she pooped in the Cup," Draper said. "That was something. We had a pretty good laugh.

"I still drank out of it that night, so no worries."

C'mon! No! No, no, no! He let his baby take a dump in the Stanley Cup? Where's your respect, Kris Draper? Hopefully, he took some rubbing alcohol, bleach, or Purell (or maybe just soap and water) to it afterwards.

I have a picture somewhere of my dad kissing the Cup. What's funny is that he thought he was getting away with it, behind the security guard's back. I was later told that you could kiss it, but couldn't hug it or try to pick it up. I'm just glad he planted his lips on the Cup before Draper's kid sat in it without a diaper. What do you think about this, Hayden Panettiere?